The Nothing Report

I thought this was going to be even less than it is, as a week after undergoing the MRI the report still hadn’t appeared. Then it showed up Sunday morning, which seems odd but what the hell.

It says nothing.

It uses a lot of complicated words and two pages to say it, which is typical of the medical profession.

What it doesn’t say is “you don’t have MS that we can see”. It also doesn’t say “aha! THAT’S the problem!” It doesn’t even say “something odd there, we’d better run some more tests”. You know they’re really sick of you when they don’t want to run more tests.

What it does say is there are some minor disc protrusions that aren’t significant and one other anomaly that doesn’t really indicate anything. What it does say is “you are still screwed and we still don’t know why”.

Without a label to put on this thing there’s nothing to blame and no predictability to the future. “You’re going to continue to have bad days” isn’t much help. Well I can make a short cut there as I can’t remember when I last had a good day. This lack of diagnosis has gone too far, and it’s going to trigger more arguments.

Meanwhile on my left foot there are a couple of toes in trouble and I don’t know why. Too much time on my feet? Feet too tired to take the time on them? What do I do? I don’t know. There has been extra strain without having my wife around to look after animals and handle whatever she can. I doubt I can convince her we need less activity in our lives, or a different kind. Yet that seems the only thing that will bring any form of relief.

Yes, I’m still screwed and don’t know why and have no possibility of finding out why, much less doing anything about it. They’ll stick a generic “chronic fatigue” label on me and tell me to go away. That’s what every doctor has done so far; given up.

Maybe I should give up. Life has got too hard already and there’s no chance of that reversing.

One thought on “The Nothing Report

  1. I have a chronic digestive condition that was getting so bad I was missing lots of work and was afraid I’d end up disabled. A gastro was zero help. It was causing me pain so I went to a forward-thinking pain clinic, where I got stabilized and able to manage. When they’d clearly done all they could I went to a functional medicine practice, who with supplements and diet changes have brought me to 80% of normal.

    I get the sense my issues are nowhere near as severe as yours but man, stay creative and persist, the solution is out there somewhere.


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